Monday, May 7, 2007
Why, Hello.
This is one of those lazy days wherein I practically melt in the summer heat. And right after I woke up this morning, I blank-stared and realized something. I became aware that the fixation I used to have on you dissolved in the summer air. No matter how much I tried to avoid it, it seemed like the shattered pieces of whatever you could call what we had is too tiny that they seem impossible to put back together.This entry might be a little too emotional, but I need to unload. And just so all of you know, I am not emo. I am not that i-hate-the-world-i-might-as-well-just-kill-myself type. There are just days wherein you feel shitty and useless. And surprise, surprise. These are one of those days.
For all sad words of tongue and pen, the saddest are the it-might-have-been’s and the what-could-have-been’s.
People have said that love never dies a natural death. It dies because we don’t know how to replenish its source. It dies of blindness, error and betrayal. It dies of illness and wounds, it dies of weariness, of withering and in this case, of tarnishing.
You know, I wish I could say this fell apart because there was someone else. But worse than that, it fell apart on our own terms. It fell apart because we made it. We messed up.
I could say you’re so worth the fight. But then I’d be lying.
It’s hard to be attached to somebody. Like you are used to all the routines you go through with that someone every single day, as if you'll not live without it, then suddenly IT STOPS WITH NO APPARENT REASON. The worst part of it is that you can't blame them because in the first place, you never really owned their heart.
I know the perfect dude is out there somewhere looking for his dudette. Oh My God, that sounded gross. But it’s true. I’m not looking for that perfect dude. From now on, I am a man-hater. Hahaha.
Okay guys, I promise I will stop grossing you out with all this lovey-dovey shit. This will hopefully be the last of it. I hate writing about this sort of thing. I don’t know why I started it in the first place.
Right now, I don’t really care anymore. I’m done.
10:16 PM
Strut It. ♥
Strut It. ♥